Sunday 28 April 2013

The Voice - UK aka the Hoarse starring Will.I.am, Tom, Jones and JessieJ

Yawn yawn, Britain has Talent has just finished and I'm a few minutes into the Cube - some rubbish-way-of-passing-the-time game show when my mother rings me about The Voice. She asks me if I'ma gonna watch it.


Well, not really my thing because the thing bores me to death - I've only ever watched a few minutes of it before flicking over to the next channel mostly ITV. Well she wants to watch it so I consider and switch my TV over.

Willy Wonka - Will.I.Am is dressed in a space suit or robot as usually. Jessie is wearing a weave looking all polished bar her strange facial expression. Are you scared?


 Boring Danny is like an over hyped child and Mr Tom Jones is looking pretty waxed. Maybe it's time for his hot Cocoa and bedroom slippers.



Then the acts come on. Now this is what gets me in the Voice. It's kinda fake and even ageist. They are looking for special voices so they let go a lot of good singers and get some mediocre lot.

The first I found cringeworthy where the girls Nu-Turea. Okay highly energetic singing but the girls could not harmonise. Or they didn't harmonise - one was out singing the other which was just noise to the ear. The beat was good but really?


 Also at thirty years old they were dressed outlandishly like over grown teenagers for attention and were so over hyped. Good luck to Will.I.Am is all I can say. Give it to Jessie J she did mention the girls did not harmonise. If you are in a group especially black R&B soul kinda setup your harmonies need to be spot on.



Then this dude called Nate James who had been dropped from about two known record labels starts to sing. Now his voice was very light on the ear with no personality at all.

All I can say it that maybe subcounsioully Boring Dan and Facial Jessie recognised it or found it familiar. It will be interesting to see The Voice success where two record labels and a MOBO nomination has failed. I'ma just saying.

Wax Tom Jones - what can I say. The man looked as pissed as hell. Yes because it seemed that he's being pigeoned holed into having 'Tom's Type of Singer'. What the fuck does that mean? So we get this old trooper who'd had more chances than hot dinners at making it. You can see Tom is not really feeling it but... but there is a little something that is niggling at him.

Yes, well all know Granddad Scottish Man can sing but is he a star?  The story is - y'all know there needs to be a story. Anyway the story is that his child put him forward. He has been a star in the making for a very very very long time.


And according the Dail Mail the man is called "Bilbo Baggins: Colin Chisholm, from Edinburgh, was once in 1970s rock band Bilbo Baggins and is the oldest entrant in the competition."  But the problem is even though he's a great vocalist what extactly is unique about that voice?


Even Gramps Waxy Tom Jones had a uniqueness to his voice. I know when Tom is singing. I know when Facial Expressions Jessie J is on the radio and Will.I.Am - these guys have a uniqueness to their voices. Anyway Granddad Tom gives in to his sentiment and presses his button. But he doesn't seem convinced.

The Adele tribute Lareena Mitchell was spot on - a great vocalist but  and there is always a big but. Her image... Compare her to Adele and she is a far better vocalist than Adele but does she have the writing talent and other additionals? Anyway she was a Tom person.



Anyway after all the struggling rejects from record companies got through and those I thought where truly talented like the Personal Shopper in the Supermarket, The Dog Groomer and the Hair Dresser where rejected I just turned off the TV. The precise moment I turned off was when some supporting act for the Killers and other rock groups got accepted. He couldn't sing all he did was turn some vowels around in the songs. So instead of singing long he'd sing lang.



Don't know. Well I do - it's shit. Simply shit and ageist shit as well. Oh what else? Na that's it - on yes boring as well - with most over singing - shit they can't sing well properly in the first place. Ima done? Yeah, I am.

As for the judges. Danny needs to quieten down he's too hyper - all that hip hop head-nodding is way too distracting. Facial Expression Jessie - we know you know all the songs so stop singing and waving your hands in the air - cause we all know you care. Will.I.Am - dope, dope and dope. Boring dope. Granddad Tom Jones - please make a stand and stop taking the obvious choices - do something new with your singers - try edgy for once.

Okay, Ima done now.

Thursday 25 April 2013

Love and Hip Hop Atlanta Season 2 Episode 1: Fuckery and foolery with Stevie J,Joseline, Erica, K Michelle, Benzino and all the other wannabes!

The fuckery and foolery that is Love and Hip Hop Atlanta starts again. Please note I'm cussing, swearing and using foul language because these guys are timewasters but great entertainment.
Nothing really happened in this episode and it all seemed rather tame  but hey didn't stop me watching it.

Mimi Opens the Show

Mimi is look gaunt, stressed and as thin as a scarecrow - thin is in? She is still with Stevie J. WTF? Really? Maybe all this problems is making her lose with weight. After two minutes of conversation with Mimi and Stevie looking cosy in bed with baby Eva, we get to understand the foolery with Joselyn is still going on.


That is Mimi, Stevie and Joselyn are still in a love triangle. Is is Stevie j'sdick that sweet? Or maybe his downtown method? Or is it his money or the show's paycheck? I'ma confused there.

Fashionwise I'm not feeling that old black pantiehose on Mimi is wearing on her bed. Also is that their bedroom or a low rent B&B motel guest house?


Also isn't that bed too small for Mimi and Steve?

Erica and Scrappy.

Planning a wedding - whatever...


Joseline and Stevie J

Joseline is in some tight lap-dancer/ tomb raider get -up doing some kind of rehearsal for a show. Okay maybe Joseline is a star in Love and Hip Hop Atlanta Planet because there is nothing about her in the real world.

Stevie telling Joseline off about Eva and Mimi - like Joseline really cares - we all know he's going to beg her for sex after this scene.

Bucky and Mama

Bucky is bitching about Erica and Scrappy's wedding. Why is she still here? I guess Mona Scott smoothed things over with a pay check and a bigger part on the show.


 As for Mama Dee she's got too much time on her hand for her to be messing in her son's business. Actually this scene makes her look very two-faced.

K Michelle

Got the record deal - well reality show rewards bad behaviour - once the units move of the shelfs or downloads get moved in itunes - no problem. She can be as crazy as wants once she gets the units moving or downloads flowing.



Anyway she is mouthing off about being for women with a glass of booze in her hands... whatever...


Erica and her Mama go to buy her engagement ring.

Mama is looking younger - okay is anyone getting bored with all this? More interesting is that Mama seems she's had a makeover. Gone is that eighties look and now with the money in her pocket from this show she is looking good.



But why is Erica buying her own engagement ring? Should Scrappy be with her?

Benzino on his wack radio show with Joseline

Benzino had got a gig on a radio station doing the graveyard shift - aint exactly drive-time y'all. Benzino is talking to Joseline about she and Stevie but they are still banging - having sex we know. Joseline says she is twenty-sex - okay... whatever age don't really matter. Joseline says she's single - yeah Stevie J is just a fuck buddy or friend with benefit...



Erica and K Michelle - babble about record deal but no one really cares. Oh and Ariel has fucked one of K Michelle's ex's and of course K Michelle is pissed off about it. Whatever. I thought Memphiz was her big bugbear.


Stevie J and Joseline

He creeps to Joseline and gives her a coat.


The man is a sleazy ball so I can't really understand this because they are still having sex. Joseline cussing him out but doesn't exactly give him back the coat. How many small furry cute animals were killed to cover the back?

Some kind of get-together with K Michelle, Mimi and Ariane.

They all catch up and now K Michelle goes about this ex. Now Ariane had a bigger part.
K Michelle is bitching about her ex and her life and apparently Ariane slept with her ex. Okay so we established that everyone there is an industry girl. 


Not sure what is happening - did she sleep with the man while K Michelle going out with him? Not really sure what it's all about. Seems making drama where no drama exists. I'm confused.

On the other hand it seems Ariane had quit complaining about Mimi and Steive J - I guess the boat has sailed since she had her own storyline now.

Scrappy and  Mamma Dee go shopping

Mamma Dee is asking if he really wants to be with Erica rather than Bucky Shay.



Scrappy is saying the Momma has to be with the fam - family I think he means and not the friends. Too much shady stuff going on the side. Too shady. All this for a pay-check? Really?
She wants him to be with Shay - are these guys for real?


Mimi and Stevie

She sounds constipated as she does the washing up - doesn't he have a dishwasher? This is still fuckery again as she continues to whine and moan about bullshit no one cares about.

Joseline walks in the cosy domestic set up and calls Mimi a maid and tells Stevie J to buy Mimi a fur coat like hers. She takes off the coat and reveals she is dressed like a hooker on patrol. You walk down the street like that police will move you on.


Mimi and Joseline start throwing insults but y'all know Joseline is like a power house - you don't throw punches where Joseline is concerned unless you mean it and have booked a plastic surgeon. So somehow in all the confusion Mimi walks out and Stevie J trails after her.


Mimi goes crazy about the fur and Joseline calling her 'Molly the Maid'. I think Mimi doesn't understand she needs a ring to make it technically a family since he does have other baby mothers.
Stevie J is now saying that Joseline is just like Mimi at her age - in his confessional but he tells Mimi Joseline was only joking. Wrong thing to say because Mimi gets really irate and goes up in Stevie J's face - then she pours water in his face. I think she only did it because the camera crew where there.

And it ends there. 

Thursday 4 April 2013

Love & Hip Hop Atlanta' season 2 supertrailer - let the ratchetness, fuckery, and foolery begin....

On the 22nd April Love and Hip Hop Atlanta starts again. Real or fake - it is  maxed out levels of  ratchetness,  fuckery and foolery - maxed out to a whole new level.  If you thought last season was bad this is worse.

 Join all the characters Steve j, Mimi, Erica Dixon, Lil Scrappy, Josephine and the fairness of old man Benzino and the other chick. I was  shocked at the trailer but enjoy.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JnOJQhHUuF8

The case of $95 million, Mel Tucker, Willy Bo-bo and inappropriate sexual conducts on the telephone.

Mel, Mel, Mel. It's tough. Mr Tucker. I discussed this case with someone and it's shame. It's a shame that it came to that. List...